Compliment or Insult?

Did you ever have a compliment that was more like an insult? The only reason you recognized it as a compliment was from whom it came and even then it had to be accompanied by an explanation?

OK you’re thinking I’m crazy. Well my dad told me I was arrogant. That was his compliment. ARROGANT! That doesn’t sound like a compliment. When further explanation was given, I realized he really did me arrogant. He didn’t mean confident, proud or even just focused. He meant arrogant.

Now how do you follow a compliment of “You’re arrogant” with any explanation that appeases it? Well first off, look at the source. My dad is the second most amazing man I know (second to my husband). He loves me probably more than I could imagine. He has taught me to love, live and loose. He is gracious and merciful, kind and loving, gentle and strong, meek and humble. OK, if you’re reading this dad, don’t get a big head and remember the humble part.

Anyways, back to the “compliment.” I looked at the source and wondered if he was pointing out something I needed to change in me. Based on the context it seemed that wasn’t it. I wondered if he misspoke and meant something else, but he continued on and I knew he meant it. So how on earth did I figure out it was a compliment? He said that I was just like him and he was smiling. Good thing he was sitting across the room or I may have hit him. Oh and the look on his wife’s face when he called me arrogant was priceless.

Needless to say, my dad and I have an amazing relationship. He is my second favorite person in the world (once again second to my husband). He is my best friend and I probably know more about him than most. We have been close my entire life and he truly is a Godly man. Some in my life have questioned our relationship, telling me it was enmeshed and unhealthy. The true is, not many have an amazing Godly relationship with their dad. In today’s world, many people do not have relationship at all with their dad.

This relationship has had many benefits in my life and some downfalls as well. When I was making “bad” choices, I lost relationship with my dad for a time. Now, I am pained knowing I put him through my “bad” choices. But when I went through the pain of loosing my first husband, my dad was the shoulder on which I cried. When he lost my mom, I was there picking up the pieces and trying to fill some holes she left.

So back to the upside down and backwards compliment, I’m arrogant. What was my dad saying to me that day? He compared me to him and still how is that a compliment? Well it comes down to this, my dad raised me to believe that what I am going to accomplish in life has a great deal to do with what I put into it combined with the promises God has already laid out for me. When I believe that God has called me to something greater and I work for it, well then that’s what’s going to happen. Nothing’s going to stop me. Arrogance is one for it.

I believe I can be the top of the top of the field in which I plan to go. Not only that but I won’t stop till I get there. God didn’t call me to the middle; He called me to the top. I can’t do it all today and that’s not what I want. Here at the bottom though, I will take one step at a time. Sometimes I will have to stop and catch my breath, but I’m heading all the way up.

The funny thing is I’m not a goal oriented person. I’m a journey person. That, of course, drives my goal driving husband up the wall. I’m always asking him to stop and enjoy now. We’ll get there when we get there, but enjoy now! But in the end, I do have goals. I do want to go to the top. BUT, I don’t have to just go there. My husband always has us moving to the goal. I make us stop and catch our breath, look around and enjoy where we are right now.

So how on earth does a “journey” person get to the top? One step at a time…