Off the hook

I think I may be my hardest critic. If you asked me what I got done in a day, I may list all the things that didn't get done or discount what did get done. I go in spurts trying to accomplish all that needs to be done, but at the end of the day there is always more that needs to be done. Somehow I get discouraged and then I don't get anything done. I cycle through this over and over.

I make ridiculously long to do list and I'm surprised when they don't finished. I set the bar high and then when I don't come close to clearing it, I come crashing to the ground. If I want to find my worst enemy, I just need to look in the mirror. I just can't seem to let myself "off the hook".

This year I made lots of goals, measurable goals and then started a blog to track my progress. I did the math on several of the realized about every two weeks I would need to be progressing to the next item to finish by the end of the year. I started to stress when I realized it is the last day in January and there are some things I haven't begun yet. I started to realize I am not going to get everything done on my list. I am not just going to give up now. It is only the first month of the year.

So then, I took a breath and realized I never let myself off the hook. I haven't look at what I have accomplished this year and been proud of it. It is time for a change in my point of view. If my goals do not all get accomplished by December 31, 2012, then I will just keep going until I do finish.

This year I started the goals. I am proud of that. I may not finish in 366 days, but I will finish.

You can follow my blog Out of Focus for now...

Here's what I have accomplished this year.

Clean (and I mean deep clean, purge & organize) 30 different areas of my home (as small as a draw & as big as a room)

• Day 1: Cleaning ~ My Pantry
• Day 2: Cleaning ~ My Hutch

Crock pot cook for 30 days (this I would like to do 30 days in a row)

• Day 1: Crock Pot ~ Creamy Chicken over Pasta
• Day 2: Crock Pot ~ Italian Roast
• Day 3: Crock Pot ~ Meatloaf
• Day 4: Crock Pot ~ Cream of Broccoli Soup
• Day 5: Crock Pot ~ Chili
• Day 6: Crock Pot ~ "Stir Fry"
• Day 7: Crock Pot ~ Butternut Squash Soup

Cook 30 new & different recipes

• Day 1: New Recipe Crock Pot ~ Creamy Chicken over Pasta
• Day 2: New Recipe Crock Pot ~ Butternut Squash Soup

Try 30 new spices in my cooking (some may be in my cabinet that I've never used...toss the ones we don't like)

• Day 1: Crock Pot ~ Chili Link to purchase spice: Tastefully Simple Wahoo Chili Spice (only available till 03.12.2012)

Read 30 new books (obviously this will take more than 30 days)

• Book 1: Reading ~ Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
• Book 2: Reading ~ Catching Fire

What IS my job?

So I'm sure you have all received one of those forwarded emails we all love that have the job description of a mom. The email says taxi driver and personal chef and maid and personal shopper and on and on and on. If you ever catch daytime TV talk show, there is always some expert that says it would take a six figure income to replace a mom if you had to pay someone to do all the things a mom does...not that you could actually pay someone to do everything I do.

Already 2012 has been busy with all the mom things. I have had to help with a science project to include shopping for the supplies. I have had to check homework. I have had to set up a new lap top so kids could do homework (which took way longer than I thought it would). I have to run kids to and from school and to and from school, three different school, different start times and different parts of town. I have had to run to school to drop off lunch money. I have to take kids to appointments, plus make those appointments. I have helped with school activities and functions and dropped off donations and volunteered. I have shown up to hear presentations and stopped by the library for the book fair. I have done hair and found costume pieces for Renaissance day and ran downstairs to see a fort of blankets.

Curling hair for Renaissance Day

Prepping material for Science Fair project

Fort in my basement...I don't want to know how they got it to stick!

I love being a mom. I love serving my kids. I love making food that excites them. I love showing up at school to volunteer and get the reward of a huge hug just for being there. I love taking kids to school and playing the punch bug game, trying to guess the radio morning show's brain buster, and listening to kid conversations. I love stopping by the school and talking to the staff. I love being a mom.

Right now I find myself as a cook, taxi, homework checker, check writer, technology support and shopper. Mom just doesn't seem like a "big" enough title. I am investing so much into my kids and some days, that investment just doesn't pay a good return. I have blogged a lot about being "out of focus" and really coming to grips with that and being okay with it. I have been learning to be "good" with just being a mom right now and when I look at all the jobs I do as a mom, I am quite sure being a mom is more than enough.