Wednesday, August 31, 2011

I am not my mother...who would have thought?

I'll be honest with you, it took me a good many years to figure out who I was and many would argue that I still don't really know, but that's okay because I'm not done figuring it out. I will say that I lived the majority of my life thinking I was like my mom. I was told that by friends, family and teachers.

My mom was an amazing women and I love most everything about her. She was a person that put a lot into the big days: Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Years, Valentine's Day, 4th of July and even St. Patty's day. She loved holidays...all of them (even the little ones). She thought everything was special and rarely got rid of anything including magazines, mail, school papers (hers from college and us kids), cards and news clippings. She was over-organized to the point of having organized chaos and no one was allowed to touch her piles (dad and I secretly believed she booby trapped them so that if we touch them they would explode all over the floor...which of course kept us from touching them). She seemed to know where everything was. She was very opinionated and I remember many times when she was not afraid to share her opinion. She was extroverted. She thrived being around people. She was different when she was retired and didn't have people around all the time. She loved nick-nacks. She loved her family and she is one of my heroes.

BUT...I am not her nor am I very much like her. I do love the holidays but I love the little things in the everyday life. I love to take pictures of my kids Karate chopping Ramen Noodles or wearing a unique outfit or just because it's Wednesday. Most of the pictures of my childhood are from holidays. I have several dozen pictures of me posed in front of the tree every Christmas but not very many of me candid or playing. In fact, I have pictures my mom took of my kids in front of the tree every year. I think I may have every Christmas and Easter captured posed in a family picture. I may have more pictures of our family standing in front of our fireplace than anywhere else.
Christmas 1997 in front of the fire place.
Christmas 2004 in front of the fire place.
Christmas 2005 in front of the fire place.
Christmas 19**...wait not in front of the fireplace (because we didn't have one in this house)
Family picture...wait for it...in front of the fire place.
Easter 2007
Easter 2008...in front of the fire place
There are way more of my mom's pictures in front of the fire place...these are just the ones I have scanned. Here's some of our recent candids.

Wiping the milk mustache

Unique Style

Karate chopped ramen

Why are you on the floor?

Video games are fun

Jumping!
I don't think many things are "special" like my mom did. I'm not very sentimental about things and have to caution myself because I would throw away everything and I have a couple kids who do care about those things. I often shove them in a box and then put them on a shelve to be forgotten. I hope someday I'll have one of my organized kids (or friends) help me organize my kids' childhood memories so they are not lost and forgotten.

I am not very organized though I try. I organize things and they stay that way only as long as no one uses anything. As soon as the family uses anything, things are not put back correctly and a few weeks or months down the road we'll all spend a day reorganizing that one little place. I don't have many areas that are "do not touch" areas. My house is family friendly (with exception to my room/bathroom). Kids go everywhere, and mess up everything on regular basis.

Yes I took a picture of my cleaning my pantry and now just a few months later you'd never know I even cleaned it at all!

My basement before the 1st overhaul
My basement during one of the major overhauls & just last weekend we took 2 large boxes of books off these shelve for my nephew.
I am opinionated but then I think we all are. I do not care to share my opinion as often as I may have in my youth. Honestly, I have found that those who share my opinion do not need to hear it from me and those who do not, I will probably not persuade and do not feel I need that. I recently had dinner with friends and my hubby and I share a very different opinion about some significant matters in our lives. The thing I told my hubby at the end of the evening was that I still love them and know they love me though we do not agree and probably never will. I don't feel compelled to make them agree and I see and understand why their opinion is different...their experiences have been different. Honestly, if we never talk about the subject again, that's fine. If we do, I don't feel I need them to agree with me nor do I need to defend my point of view. I believe what I believe and that's all I need to know.

I am an introvert. Okay, I see in my head a lot of you shaking your heads in disbelief saying that cannot be. Here's the things, and introvert doesn't mean I'm shy or don't talk around people. It means I am energized by being alone. Being around a lot of people drains me. I have to prepare myself for large family functions, work get-togethers, church events and even just church. I like my down time and alone time. I really struggle in the summer when my kids are around all the time. I enjoy moments like this one when I'm sitting on my bed blogging with the dog at my feet and the only noise is the sound of my bedroom fan. If I'm throwing a party, I would rather it be huge so people break off into little groups or be very intimate just a couple of friends chatting.

I don't see very much of my mom in me anymore. No matter how many people told me I was like her, I really wasn't. I may have those little quirks we get from our parents but the me inside is almost the opposite of my mom. Realizing that was big for me. It was a hard thing when she passed away because I felt as though I was loosing her and knowing I wasn't like her meant she was just gone. But thing is, she's not gone. She's in my heart and waiting for me in heaven. She is still my hero and I was blessed to have her as a mom.

Oh...and I hate nick-nacks for future reference. To all those who may think I would like a little something for my mantel...you're dead wrong. Remember, I'm not sentimental so I'll just donate it the DAV when you leave.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Celebration of a 2 year old!

I feel so blessed to have my nephew Aiden. He's a beautiful two year old boy. I was blessed to be in the room when his rock star mama gave birth to him naturally. It is truly hard to believe two years have gone by since that early morning call to welcome him into the world.

Yesterday we celebrated his 2nd birthday. It was full of family, friends and some two year old boys. Watching Aiden interact with other two year old made me wonder a few things.

Was there a time when life was so hard to be told not to run off the cliff in the back yard?

Was there a time when a ball on string being thrown ensued high fives?

Was there a time when it was just the best to know you and your friends all have the same cartoon car on your shoes and there was a choo-choo on a shirt?


Could it have ever been that beating an over sized Sponge Bob to get candy was a highlight of the day and then not really know what to do when candy spilled out of him?


Was there a time when a sucker filled an entire mouth?

How difficult must it have been to have to open yet another present from another loved one?

What a wonderful life to have family and friend surround you to celebrate your life.

Life is good when you're two! I can't wait to see what will be wonderful about being three!

Happy birthday buddy. I look forward to celebrating many more birthdays with you!

Sunday, August 28, 2011

We can't seem to take a "good" picture.

So last night I was playing around on my computer looking at pictures from recent events. We don't have one single "good" picture of the whole family. To be fair, there are a lot of us! Trying to get seven people to look at a camera and smile is difficult let alone five of them kids though they weren't the only issue. I looked at picture after picture. We don't even have that many "good" pictures of Ryan and I.

Okay, not let me clarify something here. I keep putting "good" in quotations for a good reason. It really depends what your definition of "good" is as to whether or not we actually have "good" pictures. If you wanted a picture that has all seven of us looking at the camera and nicely smiling in a posed picture, we don't have one of those. However, I think we have lots and lots of great pictures.

As I scan through the wedding photos, which there were around 400, I didn't find one single picture that had all seven of us smiling nicely, eyes open, and facing the camera. There are a few with Megan biting (yes I said biting) her bouquet. There are a few of Dean "torturing" Haley (she of course is laughing hysterically). There are several with Cassidy giving the others "the look" (you know the one where she looks mystified at their behavior, almost a mommy look). I have a whole series of Alex squinting or looking the "wrong" direction. Then there are one where Ryan is probably "mouthing off" and I'm looking at him like he has two heads!

The wedding isn't the only time we have had this happen. As I looked through all of my pictures I can point to one or more of us in every picture doing something "off." I have kids posing like super models or Ryan taking a bite out of a pumpkin or kids looking at each other or off in space. There are pictures of kids holding suckers upside down or Ryan making faces or even me looking at Ryan making faces and not at the camera.

I would like to announce right now that I LOVE that we have no "good" pictures...that's right, zero, zip, zilch, nada, and all the other words that mean none. You know what I see when I look at these pictures: a happy family. We are all comfortable just being us even if it's captured for life that we're doing some "dorky" pose. You can tell we're laughing in these pictures and having fun. It's not just one of us off doing something different...through the years there is always a different one of us "ruining" the picture. We all take turns.

I know a lot of people that would hit delete on some of these types of pictures. I mean...who would keep two dozen pictures in a row from our wedding with not one of them having all seven of us looking at the camera. Many of our family favorite pictures we have at least one kid doing something weird (and sometimes a parent) but then that's the Morrison Clan for you. Don't take us seriously...we don't take ourselves seriously. We're a blended, goofy bunch and we're okay with that.

So here's a little look at all our "good" pictures from different events through the year. They are in no particular order. There are many, many more....these are just a few....enjoy ;)

After Cassidy's play...gotta have the peace signs.

Halloween a few years ago...Megan looks like a deer in headlights & Cassidy's mouth is wide open.

On Vacation going to MN last year...Megan's mouth is wide open this time.

Dad jumped in last minute...

And then was attacked by kids.

Skiing this past spring...Haley is "posing"

Family hike...Haley "posing" again & Cassidy is "thinking"

Easter this year...seriously like I want your eggs on your head!

I think we have a million pics with Haley making this face.

Haley "loves" to help make a great picture.

Is anyone looking at the camera?

Haley was done smiling!

Alex...I didn't say use your hands to make yourself smile!

Dad can't just stand there with them!

Pony tail mustaches & upside down kids!

Here we go...there were about 2 dozen tries...here's just a few

No posed wedding day photos for us

Why is Megan pouting?

Alex...really?

Here's Megan biting the bouquet

Last fall...Ryan biting a pumpkin...REALLY?

More silliness

Yes...that's me choking him while I kiss him.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Girl Power

This morning I took my 5th graders to school and we were a little early. I decided to walk them to the play ground being I had a meeting at the school after school started. We found a bench by the playground and just sat and watched kids play. Normally I would shoo them away and make them play but today we just sat. It was a nice morning, Haley was a bit tired and after my "bad day" yesterday, I needed to just sit as well.

We were watching this sweet little girl (Haley guessed 1st grade but I said maybe she was a small 3rd grader like Haley was). She had a purple basketball and was shoot hoops and I was pleasantly surprised how many baskets she made in a row. She seemed to be giving it her all. Then she walked up to a group of "big" boys (probably 5th-6th graders) and asked if they would play with her. My guess is that she has a big brother in the bunch (though that was never made clear).

To my surprise, all the boys said yes and found another ball to start playing "Knock Out" (Haley informed me what it was called). For all those who don't know what that is, two people shoot at the basket and the first one to get a basket "Knocks Out" the other and the next two people shoot. Here was this sweet little girl (much smaller than Haley for comparison) playing with about eight "big" boys. Let me just say, she made my day.

First when she would "knock out" the boys, the other boys would playfully chant "You got knocked out by a girl." As a mama of several girls, my heart jumped hoping these boys would be nice and to my surprise and joy, they were. Not only did they take it in stride to get "knocked out" by a girl but they cheered her on. Every time she got a "knock out" they would cheer. One of the tutors on the playground gave her a high 5 one time. A small little crowd stopped to watch. Time after time, this "little bit" got the basket ball and shot over and over till she got a basket and then waited her turn again. I watched as the "big" boys ran around her doing tricks and throwing it over their heads. Never once did they trample her or play unfair. Some of them even seemed to let her take a shot just to see if she could get them out.

She's in the middle of the crowd with her purple basketball.
This whole time, not one single adult managed this, set rules, intervened or disrupted this innocent play. All I have to say is I love that my kids go to a Charter School. These kids seem to "get" it. They are innocent but fair. They are loving and cooperative. I saw all the character traits this school is "trying" to teach in full action this morning. By the end, my girls and I would let out a little cheer every basket this girl made. All I can say is...more power to you girl! Play with the "big" boys. When our boys are being raised to become men of valor, our girls get to apart of it all with grace, dignity and a few "knock outs."

Thursday, August 25, 2011

End to a really bad day

So have you ever had those days that by the end of the day you wish you could just hit delete. That was today. The great thing about these types of days is that they do end. Today...is almost over. Tomorrow is a brand new day. The bad thing about bad days is that sometimes they carry over. Sometimes there are things that happen on very bad days that will forever change the days ahead. That was the kind of bad day I had today. I know I'm not the only one here. I have many friends around me journeying through this very type of "bad day carry over."

I have just been informed by "the powers that be" that my opinion, my time and my resources regarding my life do not matter (regarding certain issues). I'm not being a hissy-fit throwing crabby mouthed complainer who (like my pre-teen daughters) is being overly dramatic. I'm actually serious. Today I was informed I cannot make certain decisions that directly affect my life AND because I cannot make these decision, others will with no regard to me, my time, my energy, my schedule, or my resources. It was a hard day. It was a long day. It was a day that definitely had the makings to defeat me.

BUT...I will not be defeated. What does Romans 8:31 say about this? "What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?" I will claim victory though it may look as though there is none here. This is a battle that was lost...but the war is not over. I will continue to pray for God's intervention in this matter. I will pray for God's justice over this matter. I will claim His promises to me in this matter. AND...if God asks me to submit, I will. I will do what is asked of me. I will comply. I will not bad mouth my enemy AND I will pray for God's will to be done in their lives. I will pray for these people as if they were family and not my enemies.

My life for the next year looks very difficult. There is not a reasonable way out. My family is walking into battle (forced is more like it). Though we have God on our side, it can be very difficult to walk into battle and not know what the game plan is. It seems recently, God has not been "cluing" me into His plan. Which, I hate to admit, is probably a great plan because if I knew the plan...I would wreck it! I know He is in this. I know He has a plan. For now...that is all I can focus on.

I know this is vague and somewhat goes against "my life is transparent" policy. The thing is there are matter I cannot explain at this time. When I can...I will. Until then, keep us in your prayers please. Continue to pray for: guidance, strength, wisdom, a soft tongue & heart, love, peace that surpasses all understanding, financial strength (to continue in our battle), wisdom for those who are advising us and spiritual protection over our family and our wise advisers.

Thanks for the prayers that you have already poured out over us. We felt loved today and though we "lost" a battle, we feel confident that God is our protector and our guide. I know I can only remember that today because people are praying over me (& our family) and His protection is keeping a bay all that could bring us down. Today may have seemed like a loss but I claim everyday as a victory!

Thank you so much for being my support, for listening to me ramble and for being there. I didn't know why God called me to blogging last year, at that time, but I see it clearly now!

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Prayer please

Our family has been going through a few trails recently and though I cannot go into detail explaining much, I will say that we need prayer. Many people are involved making major decisions that will directly affect our family for quite some time. It is very hard to be in a position where we have all the responsibility and must be accountable to others and yet have no true authority.

Please pray for:
-Guidance for all involve
-For truth to provail
-The best interest of the parties involved will be protected
-God will provide justice
-We will be able to see the times when we need to hold strong & when we need to extend grace
-And above all for protection over our family.

I know this sounds like a lot without knowing many of the details but unfortunately we do not have the freedom to share. We covet your prayers and if/when I can share, I will.

Thanks for listening.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Laundry Soap and other Mundane Mommy things.

OK, it's Tuesday morning in the first full week all of the kids going back to school. My "to do" list out does my "to done" list everyday in the summer. Kids really aren't helpful in making life a little easier. They want to go the pool, have sleepovers, go to camps or VBS and make all kinds of useless (but beautiful of course) crafts! Somehow, mommy becomes the chauffeur to the events, a life guard (who also has money for ice cream treats), an event planner, an event director, and a craft extraordinaire AND all on a budget the size of a sneeze. COME ON NOW! I'm exhausted!

Last day at the pool before school started.
But here's the thing I love to hear from mother of babies/toddlers...at least they go back to school after a couple of months! I just want to say BLAH at that. All I want to say to them is at least they're only babies and toddlers for a couple of years! I've got this school aged mommy thing going on for the next...oh I don't know, decade and a half! And here's my thing, I may complain about the busy summers, but there's no homework to be checked, bed time is fluid, we usually don't have to get up and leave the house at any certain time and there's a lot of fun stuff to be done! Sorry moms of little ones, I'll take your life any day.

Today, like any other day, we were up and moving around six. Kids had to be reminded to eat breakfast, brush teeth, comb hair, put on socks and shoes (getting dressed may be the one they all do just fine), get backpack, get lunch out of the fridge and put the ice pack in the lunch, get water bottle, and then a long list of individual things each kids needed. Oh, and by no means did I say these things once. I said them to each kid (some more than once). I am officially the "back to school broken record."

This morning was typical and will be followed by a typical afternoon of me being in the car for an hour because my Jr. High kiddo has the worst carpool line ever! After that there will be a whole new list of broken record sayings after school to include (but of course not limit): get a snack, do your homework, where's your planner, read please, make your lunch, pack a snack, rinse your snack dishes, pick up your dirty socks, put your cup in the sink, put your backpack in the closet, put your planner in your backpack, oh yeah...put your backpack back in the closet and ahhhhhh, don't make me repeat myself! In the midst of this, I am trying to get dinner finished, following kids around to repeat all of the above to each of them and somewhere in there not loose my mind.

So, am I happy the kids are back in school so I can have a moments peace? Not really, because that just means I get to doing all the things I put off all summer long when we were having "fun." Today, I started to make laundry detergent. It has to sit over night and by tomorrow I'll have 20 gallons of homemade laundry detergent, that cost us about $10 to make. For our family, this saves us around $175 a year. Tomorrow I'll be pouring into gallon jugs and of course working on washing "Laundry Mountain" in the basement. The fact that I have a mountain again is just irritating. I got ALL the laundry caught up before school, and like I said, today is day TWO of the first full week of school. I think I'm going to staple the clothes to the kids so they can't change anymore.

Laundry Soap

Well, I better run, because even though I only wrote about laundry soap...I have a million things to get done today before 2:30 in the afternoon. BTW...just another reason having school aged kids is hard, the list has to be done before they return because it never gets done after they infest the house!