It seems to me that there comes a time in our life when we realize we will pay the consequence for others' bad choices. "We" being the responsible and honest, the godly and trust worthy, the faithful and true. As I sit and look at my situation, I can honestly say, I have done nothing wrong here.
Now, with that said, there is plenty I have done wrong in my life. If I just look at being a mom, there are times when I have lost my temper, yelled and screamed, told my kids things they didn't need to know, didn't tell my kids things they needed to know, got lazy, was resentful, was bitter, and had a plain old bad day and took it out on my kids. It goes without saying, I've done the same in just about every relationship I have had from being a daughter, sister, and friend to being a wife and even God's daughter.
Healthy relationships are just plain hard. They require responsibility and honesty, accountability and intentionality. I would say that for the most part, having healthy relationships are far too much work for far too many. I have seen and experience way too many unhealthy relationships in my life. I have participated in my fair share and sometimes was part of the the unhealthiness in the relationship, but I would have to say that with growth and maturity, I have broken free from much of the unhealthy parts of my life and have tried to grow (God painfully pruning me along the way).
I have removed many unhealthy relationships from my life in the past several years. It is not to say that I would not engage relationship with these people again, but to say, right now, I don't have the time or energy to work that hard to be healthy around them. I enjoy having well adjusted, fruit-bearing, life-giving, happy, healthy (in mind & spirit) people surrounding me. Now, I know my friends and I are far from perfect, but I would venture to say we're healthy in our relationships and when we're not, I expect I'll be called out on it and be held accountable to find correction and God's will in my life.
BUT...there are still many unhealthy people that surround me. I cannot removed myself from being in contact with every unhealthy person on this earth (though sometimes I wish I could). Some of these people, I am forced to be in contact. It is not pleasant or fun. It creates anxiety and is more than uncomfortable. The thing about these people is they are a virus. They infect others around them and their "diseased" mindsets spread like wildfire. It doesn't take long for them to influence more and more people.
The other thing that is most unpleasant about this is that "we" have to do damage control and clean up the messes. We have to correct the misconceptions. We have to reveal the truths. We have to dispel the lies. We have to be responsible. We have to do whatever needs to be done. We have to care about it all (and we have to drive everywhere to get it done).
Well...."WE" are tired. I know I did nothing wrong and I am not asking for recognition, but I could use a break. I'm not sure the break I would get would be long enough and looking ahead, I know the path is long. I know that I can rely on God and "they" do no not. I know He is my comforter and my strength and with God on my side, who can be against me. I know all these things and rest in them. But, can I be so bold as to ask for one more thing? I need a break and I need rest.
Lord, please give me what I need to continue on this path that seems so long in front of me. Please encourage me when I am picking up the pieces of irresponsibility yet again. Please give me strength to uphold Your will when I am being fought against. Please give me peace knowing it's out of my control. And most of all Lord, please protect us as we walk into yet another battle.
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