So for those who have followed my blog and love to read about our crazy lives, I am sure you have notice that there has been silence for a while. With exception to the few updated regarding my upcoming trip to Africa on June 9th, I have not written in months. It is now time to break that silence and share why I have been silent this long.
The past several months have been very trying on our family. There have been a lot of changes and we have been in a painful season. This season is by no means over, but I feel like it is time to open the doors just a bit. There are some of you who will read this post today and already know what is going on in our lives. I want to thank you for your love and support as well painfully try to find our way.
So here we go...
Dean has decided he no longer wishes to live with us. If you did not know all the details of our family, Dean is Ryan's step-son from his first marriage. Ryan has been raising him since Dean was three. After the divorce, Ryan and his ex-wife have had split, shared custody of both Dean and Cassidy. After Dean made this decision, though it was painful, there was something that told us to let him. Though we may have had a chance to fight for him in a lengthy court battle, biology has a strong say in court and we did not have that on our side.
After much prayer and amazing counsel, we have decided to allow Dean to make this decision and not fight him on it at this time. It has been terribly painful to have one less in our home and I still pray over Dean like I do all the other kids. I have never made a distinction in my heart or mind between biological kids and step kids. My heart tells me I have five kids and I love each of them as such.
It has also been hard on Megan, Alex and Haley. Because things did not end completely peacefully, they did not get so say goodbye to Dean. As of right now, Dean does not wish to be in relationship with them and we are honoring that. Cassidy of course still sees Dean when she is at her mom's house but I think it has been hard on her as well.
We knew when we decided to blend our families that there would be hardships. We knew that there would be pain that our kids would endure because of so many families being involved. We also knew there would be great joy to have a large blended family. There are so many wonderful things that have happened because we are a family. I thank God every day for putting this amazing family together. I know I could not have done a better job...ever. He is the director of our lives and has blessed our family in abundance the past several years.
OK...I felt all this had to be shared so we could move forward. I want to be able to share things happening in my life but have not because this is weighing on me. So hopefully this will help break that silence and allow me to move forward and share about my life.
If you have any questions, please direct them to me privately. I have shared all I can share at this point. I know many of you have missed Dean with us. I pray that God shows you the comfort He has shown us as we have grieved this.
I want to thank all the people who have been and are praying over us as we muddle through this. We covet your prayers and pray over all of you as well. Please continue to pray for us as we heal from this loss and as always, thank you for listening.
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